Kivalena: it's falling into the ocean. and that's a problem.

Dear Lower 48,

I am writing feeling more refreshed than I have in days. Seriously. One would think that being a chaperone to five high school girls for an overnight high school volleyball game sleeping on a classroom floor would be beyond exhausting, but not after the week I had. The trip was a lot of fun and the perfect ending to a week that I wish had never begun.


For the past couple weeks my classroom has been in constant turmoil. The same kids will not listen and constantly try and walk around the room and out into the halls without permission. The same three children got sent home early every single day the entire week. I found myself so overwhelmed that I was always yelling at the kids. Finally on Wednesday I reached my breaking point, basically tried my hardest not to have an emotional breakdown and reevaluated my life out here.

So why the constant turmoil? To break it down quickly, here we go: A couple weeks ago one of our stores got broken into and $200,000 was stolen. There was that much money in the safe because PDF's - the money people get back for living in Alaska - were coming out and most people in the village cash the checks at the store... so the store was stocking up. They ended up taking about 12 people into custody with intentions of arresting only a few - but of course the ones who weren't going to get arrested were found with weed on them, so everyone is in prison now. Well the money was stolen from my teaching aid's grown children - so she quit because her family is now shunned throughout the village. Well that was great because I desperately need help in my classroom because there are daily fist fights among the students and I'm not comfortable with it just being me in there... but I'm once again left with no choice, so that's stressful for me and the students. And she was one of my problem student's Ahna - grandmother - so I thought that it was his mom that was the mastermind behind the stint. I know that having your mother hauled off to prison and your family shunned would have a dramatic effect on a child, so I was giving him the benefit of the doubt.

While I was doing that another child's behavior was getting out of control. Finally, on Wednesday, I had had enough. We ended up calling his parents and his dad came in to observe his behavior and then meet with me. All throughout the conference I kept saying to his dad, "His behavior has drastically changed in the past couple of weeks. Has something happened in the past couple of weeks that would cause this?" Well his dad just kind of shrugged it off and promised to work with him more. After the meeting I was talking to a teacher and she was like, "Well his mom did just get hauled off to jail for stealing the $200,000." I was like WHAT?! I thought it was (the other kid's) mom! She was like.. no... it was his. Great. I felt like such a jerk. If I would have known that I would have approached the conference quite a bit differently.

Then, while I'm reveling in that, another teacher walks in to tell me that our principal, who I absolutely think is fabulous, and his wife, who I absolutely adore even more, have resigned. As if the intensity and emotions throughout the village aren't enough to handle, now we have this thrown on us. I came home Wednesday night feeling exhausted, defeated, and questioning why I chose this career path.

I spent Thursday regrouping, reflecting and remembering why I chose a life out here. It was really, really good for me. I greeted my students Friday morning ready to kill them with kindness. While it didn't work as well as I would have liked, it's definitely a work in progress. And I hope it works. I can't handle being the teacher I was becoming. Constant yelling, constantly stressed. I had to stop and take a step back.

Friday afternoon I flew out of town and chaperoned the volleyball team to Kivalena - a village that could fall into the ocean any day now. It was a lot of fun and great mental break. We laughed a lot, ate total crap food and watched a lot of football.

Sports games are completely different out here than the lower 48. First off, multiple teams fly out to one village and compete that night and all the next day. You sleep on the floor in a classroom and hang out when you're not competing. It's interesting to say the least... There were three teams and the first night the team played two games and the next day we played two more. I got to walk around quite a bit and take a lot of fun pictures. Here are quite a few:

The sunrise was so pretty... this picture does not do it justice. It should be noted that this picture was taken after 10am. Yes, the sun was rising after 10am....

Do we look tough or what? We climbed the huge rock mountain and made it to the ocean and back. That's right - we're tough.  And Kivalena is falling into the ocean... that's why there are so many rocks.

So I'm not the best artist, but I thought it was be fun to draw a little bit of home in the dark sand up here in the Arctic.

I miss everyone all over the globe :)

and

football

and

happy hours

and

SIT hugs

and

so much more.

but I'm starting to

get homesick, so

I'm done now.

Cristina